Category: Blog

There was a moment between working full-time, solo parenting two kids, and trying to carve out a sliver of time for myself when I realized I was spending too much of my energy just cleaning up. It felt like I was stuck in a cycle of mess, stress, and burnout. I wasn’t just picking up toys or wiping down countertops, I was mentally carrying the weight of it all and it was physically exhausting me.

That’s when I decided to declutter. Not for Pinterest-perfect aesthetics, but for survival. And it changed everything.

The Real Cost of Clutter as a Solo Parent

For solo moms, the emotional load is already sky-high. You’re managing schedules, meals, doctor’s appointments, work deadlines, bedtime routines, and often doing it all without consistent support. The last thing we need is a home that drains us instead of restoring us.

What I didn’t realize was how much the physical clutter around me was contributing to my mental clutter.

Each pile, each stack, each drawer overflowing with stuff was a silent to-do list. It whispered: “You’re behind.”

And I was tired of feeling behind.

My Breaking Point

The shift started the day I realized I was spending so much of my already-limited time cleaning. Picking up, organizing, tidying, repeating. The energy it stole from me was energy I could have spent with my kids or on myself.

So I started small. I gave myself permission to let go of what no longer served us.

Why I Always Start in the Kitchen

I began with the kitchen. It’s where we spend the most time. It’s where things tend to pile up and create visual noise. Cleaning out drawers, donating mismatched storage containers, clearing the counters, underneath the sink, etc. Suddenly, I could breathe again in the place where I used to feel most overwhelmed.

That one shift gave me more than a clean space. It gave me:

More calm: I no longer feel visually overstimulated the moment I walk in.

More energy: With less stuff, there’s less to maintain.

More time: I spend less time cleaning, and more time being present.

Decluttering as Self-Care

As solo moms, we don’t always get a break. But we can take control of the spaces around us. And when we do, we often notice a shift on the inside, too.

Decluttering isn’t about perfection. It’s about reclaiming our peace. It’s about creating a home that feels like a soft place to land—not another task to manage.

If you’re feeling buried right now, mentally or physically, start with one drawer. One cabinet. One countertop. You don’t need hours. You need intention. Start small. Slowly these small changes will have a big impact.

You’re Not Alone in This

To every solo mom reading this: I see you. I know how hard it is. I also know that tiny changes can lead to powerful emotional relief. Let this be your reminder that you’re allowed to choose peace and that starts at home.

Want to get started?

Download my free Self-Care for Solo Moms guide on WellWithSamantha.com. It’s packed with simple ways to protect your energy—even when life feels chaotic.

If you’re a solo parent, self-care can feel like a luxury you can’t afford — not just financially, but in time, energy, and headspace.

But taking care of yourself doesn’t always mean long routines or expensive products. Sometimes, the smallest shifts can create the biggest sense of relief.

Here are 5 self-care habits that cost nothing, take almost no time, and actually help:

1. Turn Off Notifications for One Hour

That constant pinging? It’s draining your focus and keeping your nervous system on edge. Try muting your notifications for just one hour and notice how much calmer your brain feels.

2. Exhale Longer Than You Inhale

You can do this while cooking, driving, or standing in line. Longer exhales signal safety to your body and help regulate stress fast.

3. Lie Down for 2 Minutes Without Your Phone

Yes, just two minutes. No scrolling, no catching up. Let your body fully rest, even if it’s on the living room floor while laundry piles up.

4. Stretch While You Do Something Else

Roll your shoulders while brushing your teeth. Do calf raises while waiting for the microwave. Micro-movements can reset tension without adding to your to-do list.

5. Say No Without Over-Explaining

You don’t owe anyone a long story. “I can’t right now” is enough. Protecting your energy is a form of self-care.

Final Thought

You don’t need to overhaul your life to start healing. You just need small moments of intention — and permission to put yourself back on your own list.

You’re not behind. You’re building something sustainable.

Want more tiny wellness tips that fit real life?

Join my email list or follow along on Instagram for weekly tools and support made for solo parents.

Being a solo parent isn’t just about doing everything alone, it’s about thinking through everything alone, too.

The appointments, the lunches, the emotional needs, the schedules, the forgotten library books, the laundry, the last-minute birthday party gifts… all of it lives in our heads, taking up space no one else sees.

And that’s what makes the emotional load so heavy.

It’s not the tasks, it’s the mental juggling.

It’s trying to remember everything while still being present with your child.

It’s smiling through the chaos and wondering if anyone truly sees what you’re carrying.

What Is the Emotional Load, Really?

For solo moms, the emotional load is invisible labor. It’s the mental to-do list that never turns off. It’s being the default parent, the decision-maker, the comforter, and the planner, all while trying to stay regulated, healthy, and present.

It’s being everything to everyone… without a moment to fall apart.

And let’s be honest, some days, bedtime feels like a finish line.

A moment to finally exhale and maybe, just maybe, sit in silence for five minutes.

What We Wish Others Understood

We don’t expect perfection.

We don’t expect people to swoop in and fix our lives.

But sometimes, we wish others would pause long enough to say:

“You’re doing an amazing job.”

“You’re a great mom.”

Those words? They carry more power than people realize.

And when someone sends a text just to check in:

“How are you doing today?”, it cuts through the noise and reminds us we’re not invisible.

You Are Not Alone

If you’re reading this and feeling like you’re the only one carrying this kind of weight, you’re not.

I see you. I am you. We are here doing this together.

And this space exists so you never have to feel like you’re doing it alone again.

If the emotional load is starting to feel too heavy to hold, take a breath. You deserve rest, grace, and care, not just for your kids, but for yourself.

Ready for Support?

I’ve created a Free Self-Care Guide for Busy Solo Parents, filled with simple practices to help you recharge even when time is tight.

➡️ Download it here (or find it on my blog homepage)

Because even 5 minutes of self-care can help lighten the emotional load.

Final Thoughts

The emotional load is real. But your experience, your effort, and your love?

They’re real too, and they’re seen, felt, and deeply respected here.

You’re doing better than you think.

And if no one has told you this today:

You are an incredible mom.

Xoxo

Samantha

May is Mental Health Awareness Month, and if there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s this:

You cannot be present if you’re completely depleted.

No number of positive affirmations or parenting podcasts will refill your cup if you never carve out time for yourself, mentally, emotionally, or physically.

And yet, this is exactly where so many solo parents get stuck.

You know you need to take care of yourself.

You want to.

But then reality hits:

There’s no time.

There’s no space.

There’s no backup.

Sound familiar?

I Used to Think Self-Care Was a Luxury… Until It Became a Lifeline

For a long time, I believed self-care was something other moms and dads did, the ones with partners or nannies or time.

Then came the burnout. The shutdowns. The moments I didn’t even recognize myself.

Now, I know this:

Your mental health is not optional.

It is the foundation of everything, how you show up for your kids, your work, your relationships, your life.

That doesn’t mean bubble baths and spa days.

It means:

Setting boundaries with your time Choosing rest without guilt Creating a home environment that feels calm and functional Saying no, and meaning it, asking for help, even when it’s hard.

Here’s What Helped Me Start Reclaiming My Mental Space

If you’re ready to feel like yourself again, not just “mom”, “dad”, “provider” or “planner”, start small.

Start today.

Start messy.

And if you need help getting started, I created something just for you:

Free Self Care Guide

You can find it on the blog, it’s a list of ideas, prompts, and tiny shifts that helped me reconnect with myself and make space for joy again.

You’re Allowed to Be Human

You don’t have to be a perfect parent.

You just have to be a present one, and that starts with your own well-being.

This Mental Health Awareness Month, I hope you’ll stop waiting for the perfect time and start choosing small, daily actions that support you.

Because your kids don’t need you to be perfect. They need you to be okay.

When I first stumbled into yoga, I wasn’t exactly “zen.” I had gone through a major life event where I had very little support. This ultimately led me to my first class at the local lifetime fitness.

But yoga wasn’t just “another thing” to add to my to-do list. It became a lifeline both physically and emotionally.

And trust me: if I could start, with everything going on, you can too. Here’s how.

1. Ditch the All-or-Nothing Mindset

You don’t need a 60-minute class or the perfect mat to start yoga.

Some days, my “practice” is five minutes of deep breathing. Other days, it’s a sweaty flow. Both are valid.

Start where you are, with whatever time you have. Yoga will meet you there.

2. Listen to What Your Body (and Life) Need That Day

Some days I crave fast, energizing movement. Other days, I need a slow, restorative stretch.

Instead of forcing a strict routine, I listen to what my body (and my life) are asking for — and choose accordingly.

Energy low? Go gentle. Need to shake off stress? Go strong.

3. Sneak Yoga Into Unexpected Pockets of Time

As a working solo parent, I get it, “free time” is a fantasy most days.

That’s why I started sneaking yoga into odd little pockets:

An express class during a lunch break. 5 minutes of cat-cow stretches after putting the kids to bed. Breathing exercises in the car before a meeting.

It’s not about the perfect moment. It’s about the tiny ones you claim back for yourself.

4. Keep It Simple and Accessible

When I can’t get to a live class, I pull up a virtual class or even follow a free YouTube flow.

I don’t overcomplicate it. A corner of the living room, a basic mat, and my phone are enough.

Pro tip: Save a few quick yoga videos to a playlist so you can jump in without wasting time searching.

5. Remember: Yoga is More Than Just Movement

Yoga isn’t just about crazy poses or fancy leggings.

It’s about connection to your breath, your body, your emotions.

Even sitting quietly for a few minutes, breathing deeply, is yoga.

You’re doing it right. You’re doing enough.

Ready to Start? Here’s Your First Step:

Pick one moment today, however small, and breathe, stretch, or simply be still.

No judgment. No pressure. Just start.

Let’s be real — as a solo parent with a full workday, never-ending to-dos, and kids who seem to have more energy than a double espresso, fitting in any kind of movement can feel impossible.

But after lots of trial and error (and skipped workouts), I’ve found a few ways to actually make it happen — without needing a full hour or a babysitter on standby. Here are 7 ways I fit yoga or fitness into my schedule, even when I’m running on fumes.

1. Micro-Movement Wins Count

I used to think a workout had to be 45+ minutes to “count.” Now? I celebrate 10-minute yoga flows and quick strength circuits like they’re major wins — because they are. I keep a mat rolled out in my living room, so when the kids are playing or watching a show, I can jump into a quick virtual class.

2. Movement Between Meetings

One thing I’ve learned: 15 minutes between meetings is enough to boost energy and clear your head. I use this time for a few sun salutations, a walk around the block, or a quick HIIT burst. It’s like a mental reset button for the day.

3. After-Bedtime Wind-Down Workouts

Once the house is quiet, I often don’t feel like working out — but a slow flow or gentle stretch helps me decompress and sleep better. Think of it as movement as self-care, not one more thing on your list.

4. Schedule It Like a Meeting

If it’s not on my calendar, it might not happen. I block 15–20 minute windows in my planner and treat them like important appointments — because they are. You don’t cancel on your boss, right? Don’t cancel on your body either.

5. Keep a Workout Bag in the Car

On child-free days or work breaks, I love dropping into a studio. I keep leggings, a water bottle, and deodorant in my car so I can sneak in a class without extra planning. (Pro tip: Many studios offer shorter express classes around lunch.)

6. Combine Family Time + Movement

If I can’t get solo workout time, I turn it into a family activity: stretching with my kids, doing a dance session in the living room, or taking them on a nature walk. It’s not perfect, but it keeps us all moving and sets a great example.

7. Lower the Pressure, Not the Standard

Fitness as a solo parent isn’t about perfection. It’s about consistency, flexibility, and grace. Some weeks I only get in two short workouts — and that’s still progress. You don’t have to do it all to do enough.

If you’re a solo parent navigating work, wellness, and parenting — DM me on Instagram or drop a comment on the blog. I’d love to hear how you make movement work in your life.